What a terrible, terrible episode.
I can always find moments, lines and scenes to appreciate in the weakest Dark Angel episodes. Hours such as Boo and Shorties In Love were filled with hidden gems that made those episodes worthwhile. Brainiac however has absolutely zero saving graces. It’s a horrible hour, that’s both pointless and painfully unnecessary.
The main reason this episode’s a flop is due to the introduction of Brain: an X series who sees the future using probability. It’s an awful concept, and it’s moronically executed. His puppy-dog love for Max (since she broke out of Manticore and left him all alone) falls flat, as does his climactic death scene which lacks any sort of emotional resonance. The writers also try to shoehorn the whole “magnificent” shtick a couple of times but it fails miserably (not to mention the fact that Max cries in the hour’s closing moments over someone she just met). It made me wish season-one Max was around to smack this mopey version of our heroine around. A pity.
Asha get a little a bit of spotlight this week with her useless S1W group. However, the mystery of the “traitor” also doesn’t work seeing as how we know none of the group’s members and the actual mole turns out to be yet another nameless character. Seriously what were the writers thinking? Even Alec and Max’s banter isn’t quotable this week.
– The teaser is a flop, with a distinct focus on Brain whom we could care less about.
– Normal’s suspicions of Max being S1W could have been interesting but nothing really stems from it.
– So Brain is stealthy because he’s fat and can blend in? How fascinating.
– The kid in the arcade says the “hottest chick he’s ever seen” would come looking for him. I guess the writers have a crush on Alba? (don’t we all).
– The “break an egg” bus chase tries to be a different kind of action scene for the show, but it just ends up being awkward.
– Alec’s standout moment of the hour: mouthing off “be careful” and making fun of Logan as he talks to Asha. “What in the world do they see in you?” Hilarious.
– Max carrying Brain on her back while disguised as a cop is an admittedly funny sight.
– Max beating up the cops isn’t the greatest fight scene, but I do like how she charges at them by popping a wheelie on her bike. And Alba of course looks gorgeous in all that leather.
– Even though the writers establish that Brain uses probabilities and doesn’t see visions of the future, he still has one of Max’s death not once but twice. It’s pretty insipid, as if we’d forget that wretched hallway.
– I guess Max hugging Brain as he dies (and he hides her) is a semi-touching moment.
– Max is perched on a chair in the final scene. We all know how much I love it when our feline heroine does that.
– Well I guess this episode gave us one long-term development: Alec got himself a new apartment!
Barbs & Barcodes
Max: You WHAT? I’m dying because you turned yourself in on purpose?
Brain: Well I thought you were supposed to be strong.
Max: I’m not superwoman!
Brain: (to Max) You look so beautiful when you run.
Max: Brain! Watch the hands.
Brain: I’m just trying to hang on here.
Max: Hang on a little lower…. not that low.
Aggravatingly dull, Brainiac is a dreadfully disposable hour of Dark Angel.