Self Help

Five Tips For Coping With Loss

73caa-screen2bshot2b2016-08-182bat2b2-56-522bpm

Everyone grieves in their own way. What works for me might not work for you, but I’m hoping at least one of these tips might help make your life’s darkest moments just a little bit easier.

5 – Find your triggers
It’s vital that you learn to identify the things that make you sad. After my mother’s passing, I realized I had to sell my car because it was the same one I used to drive her to chemo sessions. The car was a trigger, and I didn’t realize how much it was bringing me down. Your trigger could be a song, a photo album on your laptop, or a piece of clothing. Once you find it, avoid it – at least in the direct aftermath of a loss. Eventually, that very trigger might be of great help when you need to let it all out. But for a while, stay away.

4 – Keep your friends close
Having lost both parents, I’ve embraced the notion that you build your own family with the people you choose to surround yourself with. Make sure that each of these individuals brings out the best in you, whether that’s through a drive to succeed or an endless sense of optimism. While they might not mean to, many people can bring you down, and it’s important that you temporarily distance yourself from the negative energy and insulate yourself with a whole lot of positivity.

3 – Start appreciating what you have
Take it from me: things can always get worse. As pessimistic as that sounds, it’s sadly true. After the death of my father, I was sure I would never lose my mother so soon. But it happened only a few years later. Bad news is uncompromising, and life doesn’t care if you’ve already hit rock bottom. So learn to be grateful and appreciate your current situation, no matter how disappointing or frustrating it may be. Because even though it might not seem likely, things CAN get worse.

2 – Exercise
I was never into fitness. Four years ago, I discovered group fitness and it changed my life (I’m even an instructor now). Famous classes like BodyPump and BodyCombat are successful for a reason: they get you out of your head and create a fantastic (and healthy) addiction. Both of these classes are available in most gyms across the globe so there’s no excuse for you not to give them a try at least once. And if group fitness isn’t your thing, find a sport that you love (the treadmill is rarely the answer). If you love it, you’ll make it a lifestyle and start looking forward to it every day. So commit to finding what gives you that endorphin high, because there’s nothing quite like it.

1 – Keep busy
I can not stress this enough. Jam-pack your days with things to do from morning to night, and don’t leave much time in-between to think. Having nothing to do often ends with you delving into a depressing cycle of reflection. And don’t worry about being in denial; you’re not. A great loss will always be there, but keeping busy in the period after helps time pass by quicker and gives you some distance. Busy also means embracing a new hobby or passion. For me, that was writing, and I put a lot of effort into building Nad’s Reviews. The cliche is undeniably true: time does heal. But you need to get time moving, and you do that by keeping busy.

14 comments

  1. So proud of you Nadim and the journey you have come through. Not everyone succeeds in coming out stronger and wiser. Thank you for continuing to share your challenge you faced and giving others the guidance to get through it. Thank you for letting us better understand what you went through. Your heart is bigger for having traveled this road and God knows we need kind hearts in this world.

  2. Concentrating on the happy memories really is the key.
    When we lose a dear one to illness, we really thought we are prepared for the inevitable.
    But it's one thing to know and another one to face it once its there.
    But come to think of it, during that illness, our loved one is fighting for us to stay.
    It is both relief and guilt we feel when they pass.
    Relief that they are free from suffering and guilt because we are letting go.
    But through it all, there is love in both sides.
    That love will never let us forget; both good and bad times.
    But we should use those happy memories to rejoice.
    Because however short a time (we think) they spent with us, happy memories outnumber the bad ones.

    I am so proud of you, Nadim, my friend.
    For sharing the joys in your life through the mediums that bring you and us joy.

    Here's to happy watching and sharing those shows with each other.

    Have a nice day. ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. I'm sure I've read this before but … boy is it incredible… such a wise soul you are ya Nadim. May be sharing this with some other family relations.

Share Your Thoughts